The Coming Farewell

They always say that you need to make gradual changes in your life. Dramatic changes never stick.

I've tried many time to make gradual changes in my life, but, it doesn't seem to work for me. I think I'm going to try a different strategy. I'm going to make many tremendous changes in my life and then see which ones stick.

The hardest of the planned changes is to cut down on my computer use at home. I'm a complete and total net addict, and it is distracting my from taking care of my real-world life.

Over the last couple of weeks I've been wondering if I could do something less dramatic than a complete internet break that would still be an effective change for the better.

I came up with a couple of options: I could use a Linux box with no X-windows. Hmmm. I didn't trust my willpower there. X is just an rpm or an apt-get away, and then comes Mozilla. Then I thought I could do something more dramatic, like get a VT420. That would force me to avoid YouTube, Adult Swim, and the like. But over the past couple of days, I've been clicking all over researching the VT420 option: where to get one, where to get a USB to RJ-11 cable. Terminfo. Ncurses. Screen.

See, even trying to reduce my computer obsession has become a computer obsession in and of itself.

There is only one way forward. A complete break.

I am reminded of the movie Train Spotting, where a guy is talking about giving up heroin.

RENTON: This was to be my final hit. But let's be clear about this: there's final hits and final hits. What kind was this to be? Some final hits are actually terminal one way or another, while others are merely transit points as you travel from station to station on the junky journey through junky life.

Maybe I need just one final hit. God of War II, perhaps.